Barnet Bain's new book 'How to Be a Friend (In an Unfriendly World): Lessons on Connection' has been ranked #25 among the 50 Best Self-Help Books of 2025 by Balanced Achievement, an online publication focused on human wellness through spirituality, psychology, and personal development. The publication noted that loneliness represents a defining modern challenge and described Bain's work as a thoughtful response grounded in awareness and compassion.
The book draws on Bain's work at Columbia University's Spirituality Mind Body Institute, reframing friendship as an ongoing practice of reflection, emotional honesty, and intentional engagement rather than a skill to be mastered. This approach positions connection as a way of relating that fosters self-understanding, resilience, and meaning.
Beyond the Balanced Achievement list, the book achieved #1 on Amazon among new releases in interpersonal relations shortly after its December 9 publication and reached #32 on Amazon's broader friendship books list. It was also named by BookBub as one of 10 Books to Help You Keep Your New Year's Resolutions, indicating its perceived utility for personal growth.
Originally developed from a Columbia University master's course Bain created for psychologists, the book emerged from real conversations about how people connect, listen, and maintain kindness in difficult circumstances. It emphasizes being with others and oneself without judgment rather than fixing people or performing kindness.
The book's content includes practical approaches to connection during overwhelming times, relatable stories about misunderstandings and reconciliation, tools for everyday friendship like listening without fixing and speaking without wounding, and reflections designed to meet readers where they are. Bain, an award-winning filmmaker known for projects like the Oscar-winning 'What Dreams May Come' and 'Jesus'—often cited by The New York Times as the most widely seen film in history—brings his creative perspective to the subject of human connection.
In a culture increasingly focused on performance and perfection, Bain's message offers an alternative centered on slowing down, looking inward, and recognizing that friendship begins where self-judgment ends. The book's recognition across multiple platforms suggests its relevance at a time when many seek genuine connection in an often impersonal world.
